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A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

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  • A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

    We have just returned from a very enjoyable holiday on the west coast of Scotland where we stayed in a charming old cottage equipped with a wood burning stove. The nights were chilly and logs were plentiful so I set the fire and lit it.

    It must be at least thirty years since I lit a proper fire in a grate but it was like falling off a log (no pun intended), with the Ovoids and logs quickly creating a very pleasant warmth throughout the evening, and the water heated. Coming in from the log store outside the smell of burning wood mixed with garlic from the kitchen was almost intoxicating. There was a hope that the wood smoke might also keep the midges at bay but that was less successful.

    Anyhow, after the first weekend our son joined us and was intrigued by the log burner. I showed him how to set the fire but he had already found something online, and apparently I was doing it all wrong!

    Predictably, by Tuesday evening I had been made redundant as our son set about preparing the fire, with tinder in one hand and iPhone in the other. Before we knew it photographs had been taken, Facebook statuses uploaded and the fire lit. All seemed well at first but after about five minutes the flames died out and the stove went cold.

    'Has the fire gone out?' we asked. 'Think so' came the reply. 'What went wrong then?' I enquired. 'I dunno, you can do it next time'.

    Now I always thought that fire lighting was one of those innate functions hard wired into our DNA from stone age times, but it seems Google, Siri and the internet have changed all that. Indeed there seem to be several valuable lessons to be learned here:
    • Regardless of experience, millennials always know better, especially when they have Google on their side;

    • You cannot rely on everything you read online;

    • An iPhone doesn't keep you warm for very long;

    • Being made redundant by a millennial is rarely the end of one's duties.


    How often have similar things happened in industry I wonder?
    ---------------

    Naughty Nigel


    Difficult is worth doing

  • #2
    Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

    Youngsters have always known best, Nigel, we have to accept that. When I moved north in 2002 the house I rented only had a couple of pretty useless electric storage heaters and an open-grate fireplace with a back boiler, so I had to learn to drive that. Fortunately, like riding a bike, I hadn't lost the skill I'd acquired as a youth. My present house has four open fireplaces, one of which has a multi-fuel stove. I think I rather over-specified the stove as the living room can reach 30C if I'm not careful!

    Remember the old adage though, build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day; set a man on fire and he'll be warm for life. (Don't try this at home )
    Regards
    Richard

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

      Familiar story, or at least the first paragraph about remembering how to do it. We’ve rented a couple of holiday cottages in colder months and have enjoyed the log burners. Simple to get (and keep!) going. Like you Nigel I’d have thought it was hard wired into our DNA. I’m amazed that someone has even bothered to do a video for YouTube of how to light a fire! Well, anyone other than perhaps Ray Mears who seems obsessed with lighting one up wherever he might be.

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      • #4
        Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

        Very shortly (in the near future) lighting and enjoying the heat from an open fire will be the equivalent of pornography as the clean air anti pollution gestapo will have made it a forbidden experience with pain of death.
        This space for rent

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

          What if we use pornography to light the fire?

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

            Photos of these wonderful fireplaces please. In my hot hot wet country, we can only dream of such fireplaces. Read wonderful stories and nursery rhymes of families sitting around the fireplace.
            * Henry
            * Location: Subang Jaya, Selangor
            * Malaysia


            All my garbage so far.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

              Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
              but after about five minutes the flames died out and the stove went cold
              We have a multi-fuel stove and an open fireplace and tend to keep them going virtually every day from October to April, 212 days, sometimes each being lit around 6:00 and again early evening, so probably about 600 times they need cleaning out, lighting and feeding.

              Plus there's the log collecting, chainsawing, stacking, splitting, taking delivery of truckloads of pallets (friend works at builders merchant) to cut for kindling, replenishing fuel baskets morning and evening, etc. But our heating bills are extremely low.

              And somebody gives up after 5 minutes?

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              • #8
                Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                I'm sure that it's the millennials who are responsible for engineering Windows10,
                and other mindless software that gets obsessively updated for no other reason
                than to make life tough for their tribal elders, forcing them onto the bowling green.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                  Originally posted by DavidB View Post
                  Plus there's the log collecting, chainsawing, stacking, splitting, taking delivery of truckloads of pallets (friend works at builders merchant) to cut for kindling, replenishing fuel baskets morning and evening, etc.
                  Regards
                  Richard

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                    TimP ...you made me laugh out loud at your quick comment, my sense of humour that..after scrolling down to read the comments about lighting a fire..

                    More to the point I was lighting fires when I was 10 years old as that was all we had in the house and can still light a good fire now!!

                    Google...!! knows nothing as Basil once said to Fawlty...

                    Peter
                    OMD-EM1 Mk2, 40-150. f2.8Pro, MC-14 converter, 7-14mm 2.8, 17mm 1.8, 45mm 1.8G, OM50mm 1.8, OM 28mm F2.8, OM 200mm F4 Giottos Silk Road YTL8384Tripod Giottos MH5011 head FL36 and other bits and bobs...

                    www.flickr.com/photos/141996687@N02/

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                    • #11
                      Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                      Originally posted by Rocknroll59 View Post
                      More to the point I was lighting fires when I was 10 years old as that was all we had in the house and can still light a good fire

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                      • #12
                        Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                        inside of the windows! (And that was before my parents installed central heating).

                        P.S. All money saved has been spent on new photography gear.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                          Unfortunately, my FiL had the good idea of using his greasy fish and chip wrapping papers to get their fire going, and they went up into their chimney and caused a fire.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                            Originally posted by DavidB View Post
                            When I was young we were only allowed to put an electric fire on if there was ice on the inside of the windows!
                            Sounds familiar. My bedroom was above the garage too so no warmth from below. We did get central heating eventually but that was solid-fuel fired so had a tendency to go out.

                            "And you try and tell the young people that today and they'll not believe you" - courtesy Monty Python's Four Yorkshiremen sketch .
                            Regards
                            Richard

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: A Parable of The Millennial Son and the Wood Burning Stove

                              Originally posted by Otto View Post
                              Sounds familiar. My bedroom was above the garage too so no warmth from below. We did get central heating eventually but that was solid-fuel fired so had a tendency to go out.

                              "And you try and tell the young people that today and they'll not believe you" - courtesy Monty Python's Four Yorkshiremen sketch .

                              And we were chasticised for using our fingertips to make smiley faces in the ice on the inside of the window glass, for drawing attention to how flippin cold it was indoors.

                              Comment

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